Beautiful Mess

No one tells you,
that just being yourself,
will sometimes be difficult.

You’ll fight fears that
no one but you knows about,
and you won’t always win.
You’ll curl up in a little ball
in your bed,
helpless.
You’ll bury your face
in your pillow,
screaming your lungs out
and you won’t even know why.
Then you’ll cry yourself
to a thudding headache
And you’ll act out at the world
in anger
and frustration –
looking for answers.

For a moment,
You’ll hold your breath
Waiting for something
A sign
A whisper
A call
An answer to your prayers
And it won’t always come.

No one tells you
that just being yourself,
Will sometimes be too much.

That someday,
You’ll convince yourself
that you can handle it all,
all at once,
all by yourself.

You’ll let your pride
and your emotions
dictate your actions
And you will self destruct
You’ll remember reading somewhere;
You are your own worst enemy,
And it’ll dawn upon you.

No one tells you
That it’s okay to feel.

It’s okay to feel sad,
It’s okay
to have a good cry
and let it all out,
It’s okay to feel angry
or disappointed,
Even guilty.

It’s okay.

It’s okay
to feel vulnerable
And it’s okay
to not have it
all figured out
No one has it all figured out –
Don’t let their masks
fool you.

No one tells you all that.
What you need to know
Is you’ll find yourself
in all that mess.

In all of your pain,
you’ll find healing,
reviving the parts of you,
That you lost along the way
Your tears
will water your growth
and transformation
into a better,
stronger version
of yourself
Your anger
will teach you patience
Your disappointments,
resilience.

What you need to know;
Is that
it’s okay to feel.
it’s the only way you heal.
Your emotions
are never
a sign of weakness.

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